How To Comeback from Failure
I spoke on my Instagram Story this week,
about the clients who come back 2 weeks, 2 months or 2 years later,
after feeling like they "fell off" or "gained weight back"
are the bravest people I know.
Failure isn't an option, but it's a part of the process.
There's no hopelessness.
It is actually THE time to come back,
not the time to hide in shame.
I promise -
hitting rock bottom is not the end,
it's just the beginning for actual growth and change.
Here's how to come back from "failure":
Psychology Today says, "
Substitute any personal goal you have for the metaphor of the mountain and ask yourself what motivates you: Are you more intent on trying to get what you want or are you focused on not failing? The answer is an important piece of self-knowledge."
1. Reframe the setback.
This does not mean re-living it because running that loop over and over in your head isn’t going to do anything but keep you stuck in place. Try adopting a consciously distanced stance—recalling the situation and focusing on why you felt as you did, rather than what you felt—helps to manage emotions and facilitates understanding of your reactions. Try thinking about the situation as if it happened to someone else to make sure you don’t get swept back into the heat of the moment.
2. Focus on what you missed. Were you too busy or a in a mood or something else that you missed the "warning signs" popping up that led to the "failure". Try to work on mindful techniques to help keep you aware (search blog under "mindfulness" click here).
3. Consider whether fear of failure helped to guarantee it.
Sometimes, we fail because we just don’t have the skillset to accomplish the goal we’ve set for ourselves and we fail to recognize it.
4. Find the positive (without putting on rose-colored glasses).
Locate your “flow,” as Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi puts it. Get over failure by spending time thinking about and experiencing what really makes you happy. Do something that fully engages you on every level, that puts you in flow. Do something that heightens your feelings of involvement, satisfaction, and joy. The activity should be something that makes you happy, not what makes everyone you know happy.